# Insects + Comedy = 'Sects... a Web comic strip.



## Stewart Vernon

Something from my blog, from about 10 days ago, that I thought was funny and stands alone and can be enjoyed out of sequence with the rest of the 'Sects series. The first gag is a homage to the Beatles' Abbey Road album to give credit where it is due.










If it tickles your funny bone, I started about 6 months ago so there is a lot more at the blog...


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## Laxguy

Love affogato! But I try to not take in caffeine after six.....


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## Stewart Vernon

I usually get my caffeine from sodas... but the idea of Affogato isn't bad to me if I could get it with a milder brew that didn't overshadow the ice cream. I've just never been a coffee person. I don't hate it by any means... just don't love it either. It made for a good run-it-into-the-ground joke, though, so I ran with it!


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## Laxguy

Cool! But, uh, ice cream in an affogato? Sacrilege! Gotta be gelato! 

I am afraid I am a coffee addict, now roasting my own, grinding it, and putting it through an espresso machine most mornings. Never been a fan of iced coffee, but coffee ice cream with dark chocolate bits, now there's a ready made treat.....

Hope you run some more!


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## Stewart Vernon

Laxguy said:


> Cool! But, uh, ice cream in an affogato? Sacrilege! Gotta be gelato!
> 
> I am afraid I am a coffee addict, now roasting my own, grinding it, and putting it through an espresso machine most mornings. Never been a fan of iced coffee, but coffee ice cream with dark chocolate bits, now there's a ready made treat.....
> 
> Hope you run some more!


Sorry about that... I should have said gelato. I gather ice cream is an acceptable substitute sometimes... maybe not for the connoisseur but for someone like me who wouldn't know the difference 

My brother-in-law works for a coffee company, so I think I stand out as weird for not being into coffee. My father liked coffee, though standard and not fancy stuff... both grandmothers liked coffee though. I'm more of a tea person, hot or cold. I like iced tea best, but hot tea with honey and lemon is good.

Thanks for the vote of confidence on the comic! I don't want to wear out my welcome, but I might be able to post some more here if they are well received.


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## Laxguy

No, didn't mean to put out a "shoulda". Ice cream is fine as is regular coffee out of a can. My parent both drank that stuff. Folger's or Hill's or Maxwell House. Then came Yuban into our house, replacing powdered instant, which I guess replaced the brewed canned stuff at some point! Ugh! How did we drink that stuff??


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## Stewart Vernon

Most of my coffee drinking fell into two time periods...

When I was a kid and would stay with my grandmother, I would drink coffee with her. It was less about the coffee and more about doing what she was doing.

The other time was when I had a job where I covered Virginia and North Carolina as my service territory and spent most nights in a hotel. Many of those hotels had the free breakfast and that always included coffee so I would drink it to save money.

Outside of that, some restaurants I will partake in the free coffee... especially at IHOP. I haven't tried a lot of the fancier stuff... though I was in a McDonald's recently and while I was ordering my food someone in the drive-through changed their mind so they had made an extra of a non-wanted frappe so they offered it to me. It wasn't bad, especially for a cold coffee beverage that I thought I wouldn't like... so maybe I would like some other things more than I think at times.

I kind of thought this was a good joke to make, for the cartoon, since Starbucks and coffee are a big thing. I figured the gag might go over some people's heads... but secretly the coffee drinkers would enjoy it more because of that


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## Laxguy

If you want great coffee, run, don't walk away from Starbucks or MacD.... Find a local espresso house that has good reviews, order a cappuccino, which, if well made, has a perfect balance of coffee and dairy, so it's both naturally sweet and highly flavorful. 

An adventure!


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## Stewart Vernon

Maybe I'll give something a shot one day when I am feeling adventurous.


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## Scott Kocourek

The 'SECTS comic is quite good. It's fun to keep up with. Check it out: https://iesjv.wordpress.com/

Thanks Stewart


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## Laxguy

Hah! The fourth one down is about The Shadow! Who knew?


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## Stewart Vernon

Thanks, guys... The fly, Buzz, is my go-to character for misinterpretations or saying things wrong. I was wondering how many people picked up on the dialog in "The Shadow" and thought I made a mistake vs realizing it was intentionally wrong...

"Defender of the weak...Protector of the innocent..." Defender and Protector normally would be reversed in those phrases... but Buzz gets things wrong a lot 

I was particularly proud of today's end-of-comic line from Buzz, though... since we're on the topic, I'll paste that cartoon in here for you guys following along.


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## Laxguy

Contessa is as Contessa does....!


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## Stewart Vernon

I took a swipe at net neutrality in my Sunday post this morning... I've done it before in some earlier cartoons.


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## Stewart Vernon

I renamed the thread since it branched away from my original post and now has a few non-coffee related posts in it. Meanwhile, back at the ranch...

We got some snow here in NC... and as usual, the natural "gotta clean out the grocery store" panic set in... but I think I figured out where all the stuff is going...


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## Stewart Vernon

Just for fun... This is how you bring in the new season...


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## Stewart Vernon

The one I posted today is basically a parody of the DirecTV commercials... so I thought it appropriate to post it here, especially since I haven't put one up here in a while.


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## Stewart Vernon

Haven't posted in a while... lots that I've done on my blog that I'm proud of in the meantime... but I try not and spam the forum. I did want to post my Valentine's Day episode though. It's not what you're expecting!


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## billsharpe

Sometimes I get "Sects"; sometimes I don't.

Please read that sentence but don't pronounce it. :grin:


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## Stewart Vernon

billsharpe said:


> Sometimes I get "Sects"; sometimes I don't.
> 
> Please read that sentence but don't pronounce it. :grin:


You're not alone. Sometimes the jokes are very much a stretch... sometimes I swing and miss, they aren't all winners. I look back at them myself, and sometimes I feel like one lands better than another. That said, sometimes ones I feel like ought to land well, are ones that people don't get.

The name was kind of on purpose too  It's obviously referring to the insects... but it is meant to play on both "sex" and "sects"... I'm actually pretty proud that if you go on Google and search for "sects comic strip" you see a LOT of entries from me now! Just "sects" by itself gets what you would expect it to get... My ultimate goal would be to take over the search results for just that keyword!

I am thinking about collecting some of these from the beginning into trade paperbacks... probably digital editions at first, maybe some on-demand printing if that works well for when I've been a guest at conventions to sign and sell them. I have some nice slogans on the back-burner for that day like:

"'Sects Sells!"
"Would You Pay for 'Sects?"

And so forth


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## Nick

Great stuff, Stewart. I'm wondering if they have "'Sects" in sects that have sex, but not in cults?!


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## Stewart Vernon

Thanks, Nick!

Hmm... so much homonym action there in one place!  I wonder sometimes if it's weird that I chose a semi-suggestive name for a comic strip that I honestly always intended to be pretty much family friendly. The dirtiest part of it really is the name.


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## Nick

Stewart Vernon said:


> Thanks, Nick!
> 
> Hmm... so much homonym action there in one place!  ...The dirtiest part of it really is the name.


I didn't get that there was any "homonym" action in "'Sects". I've always
thought of it as an essentially straight or, at the least, not an _in-sect-ual_
strip and certainly not _in-sect-uous!_


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## Stewart Vernon

At least so far... I've shown that there are a bunch of ants and a bunch of bees... but generally just one of everything else. I mean, I guess there are others out there, but I haven't actually shown more than one ladybug, katydid, spider, beetle, earthworm, or snail. There are two flies, both male... and two earthworms, since she split... but I haven't established any relationships at all either way actually.

There has always been a gag in the back of my mind... wanting to introduce a black widow character that every time she appears she has a new husband to introduce.


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## Nick

Just the thought of a black widow with a new hubby every time
cracks me up. Oh, the possibilities, not to mention the not-so-
subtle racial undertones.


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## Stewart Vernon

This comic has not evolved at all the way I thought it would. It's the first ongoing thing I've ever created. What I thought it would be when I first started, well, it quickly turned into something else. I hope I get famous one day so I can write about it all, because I think it's kind of interesting how things evolved and changed. But I have to be famous for anyone to care about the backstory.

It is very much a case, though, of some of the characters starting to write for themselves. You always hear writers talk about that... and it's true. Some characters practically beg me to write certain jokes and evolve them in certain ways, beyond what I'd originally intended. Along the way it means I abandoned some stories entirely, and others have been shoved to the side. I also somehow have sometimes too many characters to juggle AND not enough, because I never have introduced characters I conceived from the beginning (like the black widow).

I think the black widow gag would be great for a bunch of up-front gags... then as I've tried to start ramping up the two-prong story where something is going on in the background, I'd get to use the black widow bit in the background while telling other stories in the foreground. I need to at least sit down and draw the characters at some point so I can be ready to use them if the mood hits.


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## James Long

If remember correctly, I read that Jim Davis ("Garfield") would often start a cartoon with a sketch. He would come up with the punchline reaction image and then write a script that would lead to that image. It is formulaic, but it seems to work.

There are a variety of styles ... some are just punchlines, other are deeper reads. Some want to make you laugh, others want to make you think. All work in different ways.


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## Stewart Vernon

I hadn't read that about Garfield... but it makes sense. I sometimes think of the punchline first too, and work backwards... especially when dealing with the horrible puns I like to use. Sometimes I try to tell a little bit of a story, sometimes I just go for the really silly. Each have their merits.


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## Stewart Vernon

A couple of recent things... since it's been a month. Older-timers might appreciate what I did this past Sunday. It probably helps to know that last week I started disguising my fly (Buzz) with a shamrock and he was calling himself Shamrock Holmes, World's Greenest Detective... I also was sneaky about how I introduced the name of his "Watson" sidekick... who is a mustached My Little Pony that he has been carting around for a couple of weeks now...










I've been continuing that detective gag this week so please check out the blog for the rest of the story! But since I mentioned the black widow character in this thread last month... this week turned out to be a good time to introduce her, so I did that Wednesday:










Expect to see Wynona again... I'm less than optimistic for Douglas


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## Stewart Vernon

Wynona was back on April 6th... as expected, Douglas did not make it...


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## Stewart Vernon

Last night I was given a lemon by life... so I made lemonade out of it... lost power for 4+ hours, decided to sleep, and ended up getting a story out of it!


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## Nick

Stew, your inspiration was _brilliant! _A shot in the dark, as it were. 

Question - if the power goes out at night when it's already dark,
does it really matter? When my electricity goes out at night while
I'm asleep, the only way I can tell is that my bedside digital clock
is flashing at me when I awake. My UPSs keep most every thing
else going.


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## James Long

Nick said:


> Question - if the power goes out at night when it's already dark,
> does it really matter?


I run air conditioning in the summer and heat in the winter. Plus the water pump runs on electricity so getting up in the middle of the night for the restroom means one flush (or less). Yeah, it matters. One could even say it *bugs* me.


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## Stewart Vernon

I don't have functioning air conditioning... but I do have a fan... so being without power means I lay in my sweat instead of the fan blowing it away. It makes enough of a difference to matter. Otherwise, I often have taken the approach that power off at night means time for bed... just go to sleep and wake up whenever the power comes back on.

I've lived in places where I was on a private well, so no power meant no water either. That was a problem... at least being on city water usually means you keep water during a power outage unless it goes on for several days.

Last night the most aggravating thing was not being able to get to my comic strip and get it posted actually on Sunday... but since I got an idea that was better it probably balances out... and I do have the option of backdating posts to my blog so if I don't tell people, sometimes they don't notice if my posts are after midnight!


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## Stewart Vernon

FYI, on a technical note... while asleep I was imagining how I'd handle the Buzz carrying the candle stuff. I was pleased when I actually got to the computer and it worked as easily as I'd imagined/hoped. I do everything in Adobe Illustrator... so I was able to layout panels the way I wanted them, and then drop a black cover over that with a see-through hole in it... then place a semi-transparent yellow inside that... and move those around to let some parts of the background show through wherever I had Buzz with the candle. I was pretty proud of myself for figuring all that out during the power outage and then having it all work as easily as I imagined it would.


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## James Long

Stewart Vernon said:


> FYI, on a technical note... while asleep I was imagining how I'd handle the Buzz carrying the candle stuff. I was pleased when I actually got to the computer and it worked as easily as I'd imagined/hoped.


I am glad it worked out. A lot of times during power failures or even computer updates and reboots I sit there waiting to get my systems back so I can actually do something. And if I give up and go to bed sleep doesn't come fast due to my desire to actually get the work done (plus the lack of conditioned air if it is a power failure).


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## Stewart Vernon

James Long said:


> I am glad it worked out. A lot of times during power failures or even computer updates and reboots I sit there waiting to get my systems back so I can actually do something. And if I give up and go to bed sleep doesn't come fast due to my desire to actually get the work done (plus the lack of conditioned air if it is a power failure).


Yeah, The power was out about 4 hours, of which I only slept about 2... I waited a while before giving up and laying down, then it took a bit to actually fall asleep. When the whole neighborhood is without power, though, it's amazing just how quiet it gets at night... I might have slept longer but about an hour before the power really came back on there was a brief 1-2 second burst of power and I was laying on my back looking up and my overhead light was still on so it was right in my eyes and that woke me back up for good!


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## Dude111

Im sorry the power went out on ya Stew,thats always not good!!


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## Nick

One word... UPS battery backup!


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## James Long

Nick said:


> One word... UPS battery backup!


The last one I ordered came FedEx.


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## Stewart Vernon

Nick said:


> One word... UPS battery backup!


No battery backup on the Internet service... no power to the Time Warner equipment outside... also, I've been having poor luck recently with my UPS on my computer. For one they don't run too long anyway, but I've been having failures where the UPS will drop out even when the power service does not... I've actually had more reliable computers since I stopped using my UPS in recent months. Makes little sense, but there you go... the consumer UPS models just don't seem to be built as well as they were when I first started getting them years ago.


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