# Hillary's First Night As President - January 2009



## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

Hillary Clinton gets elected President and is spending her first night in the White House. 

The ghost of George Washington appears, and Hillary asks, "How can I best serve my country?"

Washington says, "Never tell a lie."

"Ouch!" Says Hillary, "I don't know about that."

The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears. Hillary asks "How can I best serve my country?" 

Jefferson says "Listen to the people."

"Ohhh! I really don't want to do that."

On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears.

Hillary asks, "How can I best serve my country?"

Lincoln says "Go to the theater."


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## jfalkingham (Dec 6, 2005)

ROFLMAO :lol:


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

That would be a good joke if you put George Bush in instead of Hillary, and put it back to 2001. Except the joke then loses its humor when you think that if George went to the theater, that would make Dick our president. :nono:


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## Richard King (Mar 25, 2002)

Aside from that, how was the play?


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## wisdom (Nov 13, 2005)

Bogy said:


> That would be a good joke if you put George Bush in instead of Hillary, and put it back to 2001. Except the joke then loses its humor when you think that if George went to the theater, that would make Dick our president. :nono:


Hillary would be perfect at a theater,. Because the only way that she could have elected was to do a heck of job acting. You know...acting like she's not a socialist, acting like she's not a rabid feminazi, acting like she has any morals...


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## Geronimo (Mar 23, 2002)

wisdom said:


> Hillary would be perfect at a theater,. Because the only way that she could have elected was to do a heck of job acting. You know...acting like she's not a socialist, acting like she's not a rabid feminazi, acting like she has any morals...


Yes it is the liberals who are filled with hate and make personal attacks.


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## wisdom (Nov 13, 2005)

Geronimo said:


> Yes it is the liberals who are filled with hate and make personal attacks.


No, both sides are equally good at it.


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## Geronimo (Mar 23, 2002)

OK wisdom. I will buy that. Others have claimed one side hasa amonopoly. But if yous ee some commonality there-- well that is fine by me.


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## ebaltz (Nov 23, 2004)

Bogy said:


> That would be a good joke if you put George Bush in instead of Hillary, and put it back to 2001. Except the joke then loses its humor when you think that if George went to the theater, that would make Dick our president. :nono:


So you as the always blowing your smoke about being a preacher or whatever you think you are, would like to see our current President, a devout Christian dead. Yeah I can see what kind of "religion" you espouse. Do the rest of the Christian world a favor and stick a sock in it.


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## JM Anthony (Nov 16, 2003)

ebaltz said:


> So you as the always blowing your smoke about being a preacher or whatever you think you are, would like to see our current President, a devout Christian dead. Yeah I can see what kind of "religion" you espouse. Do the rest of the Christian world a favor and stick a sock in it.


Wow!, ersatz, how did you read that into Bogy's post. I don't see where he said he wanted to see Bush dead??

John


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## wisdom (Nov 13, 2005)

JM Anthony said:


> Wow!, ersatz, how did you read that into Bogy's post. I don't see where he said he wanted to see Bush dead??
> 
> John


The implication of the joke was that Hillary would go to the theater to be murdered just as Lincoln had. And since Bogy suggested that Bush should have gone to the theater, the assertion was that Bush should have been killed. It's fairly obvious.

ebaltz: be careful, the management doesn't like people to question the more liberal members of this board.


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## Richard King (Mar 25, 2002)

Hee hee, "wisdom" must have just made a joke (I think). Actually, the "management" prohibits personal attacks such as that made against one of our liberal posters. I would have done the same if it were a conservative poster being attacked. You are treading on on a fine line. Drop it.


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## DonLandis (Dec 17, 2003)

Bogy said:


> That would be a good joke if you put George Bush in instead of Hillary, and put it back to 2001. Except the joke then loses its humor when you think that if George went to the theater, that would make Dick our president. :nono:


Now that is funny! Ah... better explain what-

Hillary, the anti-christ and her faithful servant, Bogy, the purveyor of bogus posts.


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## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

DonLandis said:


> Now that is funny! Ah... better explain what-
> 
> Hillary, the anti-christ and her faithful servant, Bogy, the purveyor of bogus posts.


Main Entry: *bo·gy* 
Variant(s): also bo·gie, bo·gey or boogie
Function: noun; pronoun, corruption of proper noun
Inflected Form(s): plural bogys, bogeys also bogies
Etymology: probably alteration of bogus_ l._ or bogle _ger._
1 - /'bu-gE, 'bO-, 'bü-/ : SPECTER, PHANTOM bogyman
2 - a source of fear, perplexity, or harassment
3 - one stroke over par on a hole in golf; above par, one too many, excessive strokes
4 - an unidentified aircraft; especially one assumed to be hostile
5 - nickname of a preacher, especially in Iowa

Source: "The New American Nicktionary"


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## ebaltz (Nov 23, 2004)

Nick said:


> Main Entry: *bo·gy*
> Variant(s): also bo·gie, bo·gey or boogie
> Function: noun; pronoun, corruption of proper noun
> Inflected Form(s): plural bogys, bogeys also bogies
> ...


Nick, that was sweet!


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## Geronimo (Mar 23, 2002)

The management of this board is conservative. It might be best if all just took a step back. If Bogy's remark was unfortunate so was the original joke.


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## wisdom (Nov 13, 2005)

Geronimo said:


> The management of this board is conservative.


(in a high squeeky voice) Saaay Whaaaatttt!!!! :nono2:



Geronimo said:


> It might be best if all just took a step back. If Bogy's remark was unfortunate so was the original joke.


I think we can agree that insinuating that anybody should be assassinated, whether a joke or in seriousness, is inappropriate.


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## Richard King (Mar 25, 2002)

I can't recall ever being accused of being very defensive of liberals or their stands on the issues of the day. In anycase, this being the "humor" forum is not the place to debate politics. We have another forum for that where it is a bit more freewheeling. Everyone who thinks I stand up for liberals too much raise their hands. I don't see anyone.... wave them high now.... nope, still no one.


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## LSUMBA (Feb 6, 2006)

outstanding


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

Bogy said:


> That would be a good joke if you put George Bush in instead of Hillary, and put it back to 2001. Except the joke then loses its humor when you think that if George went to the theater, that would make Dick our president.





ebaltz said:


> So you as the always blowing your smoke about being a preacher or whatever you think you are, would like to see our current President, a devout Christian dead. Yeah I can see what kind of "religion" you espouse. Do the rest of the Christian world a favor and stick a sock in it.


I think if you look closely you will see that I actually am desperately hoping George Bush finishes out his term. Unless he is impeached. :grin:
(You don't seem to have a problem with Nick making a joke condoning the assassination of a current Senator, and/or a future president. Hmmmm.)


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## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

I've always thought that abject liberals, for the most part are humorless. The direction this thread has taken pretty much confirms that belief.


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

Nick said:


> I've always thought that abject liberals, for the most part are humorless. The direction this thread has taken pretty much confirms that belief.


Just liberals, Nick? I suppose ebaltz and wisdom are your idea of witty and funny? :lol:


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## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

Bogy said:


> Just liberals, Nick? I suppose ebaltz and wisdom are your idea of witty and funny? :lol:


You have a point, Preacher. :sure:


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## Geronimo (Mar 23, 2002)

wisdom said:


> (in a high squeeky voice) Saaay Whaaaatttt!!!! :nono2:
> 
> I think we can agree that insinuating that anybody should be assassinated, whether a joke or in seriousness, is inappropriate.


Yes we can. And I think that we can also agree that it was the original joke that did that.

Look it is an old joke. It has been used against every president of the last 30 years. no it is not all that funny. No more or less funny in the context of Hillary Clinton or President Bush than it was in any of the others.

but as someone else said it is just a joke.

And yes the management of the board is conservative. I don't know who you think runs it but they are right of center. They let others speak their minds as well but they are clearly conservative and proud of it.


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## DonLandis (Dec 17, 2003)

Some of you people have no sense of humor. IT was a funny joke but, Bogy- next time you want to try humor- tell your own joke, Plagerizing another's theme with the name change in the same thread doesn't cut it. Yes, the theme was old but here it was posted first in this thread as a Hillary joke. You should not have any problem finding thousands of jokes about GWB. There have been more demeaning jokes about him than since Gerald Ford's clumsiniss jokes or maybe Bill Clintons sex in the Oval Orifice. 

And, Geronimo- If you want to post here in this section, you need to take classes in developing a sense of humor. Maybe you know what that is but you never deviate from your sober persona.

Nick- I had heard the joke before with different names but it still brought a smile to my face. Thanks for this and all your humor. I enjoy reading them. Now I have to get back to work. That is no joke!


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## BobMurdoch (Apr 24, 2002)

We moderates in the middle think you are BOTH nuts! :lol:


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## Geronimo (Mar 23, 2002)

DonLandis said:


> Some of you people have no sense of humor. IT was a funny joke but, Bogy- next time you want to try humor- tell your own joke, Plagerizing another's theme with the name change in the same thread doesn't cut it. Yes, the theme was old but here it was posted first in this thread as a Hillary joke. You should not have any problem finding thousands of jokes about GWB. There have been more demeaning jokes about him than since Gerald Ford's clumsiniss jokes or maybe Bill Clintons sex in the Oval Orifice.
> 
> And, Geronimo- If you want to post here in this section, you need to take classes in developing a sense of humor. Maybe you know what that is but you never deviate from your sober persona.
> 
> Nick- I had heard the joke before with different names but it still brought a smile to my face. Thanks for this and all your humor. I enjoy reading them. Now I have to get back to work. That is no joke!


my point was that I found it odd that someone would object to the joke if attached to one politician but not to another. If that means I have a "sober persona" so be it. But if you think I never deviate from the serious you don't know anything about me or my contributions here.

I agree with one point which I think you raised which was "lighten up guys". But I think it applies to everyone Don.

And Mr. Murdoch I agree. We are all nuts.


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

DonLandis said:


> Some of you people have no sense of humor. IT was a funny joke but, Bogy- next time you want to try humor- tell your own joke, Plagerizing another's theme with the name change in the same thread doesn't cut it.


Don, my variation was not really about the president, but about the vice-president, which is also an old joke. Perhaps your sense of humor doesn't work so well either when conservatives are concerned.


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## ntexasdude (Jan 23, 2005)

Potato(e)


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## DonLandis (Dec 17, 2003)

Bogy said:


> Don, my variation was not really about the president, but about the vice-president, which is also an old joke. Perhaps your sense of humor doesn't work so well either when conservatives are concerned.


:sure:


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## DonLandis (Dec 17, 2003)

Geronimo said:


> my point was that I found it odd that someone would object to the joke if attached to one politician but not to another. If that means I have a "sober persona" so be it. But if you think I never deviate from the serious you don't know anything about me or my contributions here.
> 
> I agree with one point which I think you raised which was "lighten up guys". But I think it applies to everyone Don.
> 
> And Mr. Murdoch I agree. We are all nuts.


:hurah: finally some humor from you in the last four words even if it was you just agreeing something of levity and you are right, if you are really a life of the party, jokester type then I really don't know you . All the posts I have seen from you are always very serious, almost like you work for the FBI type serious. I'm not knocking it, sometimes in that light it is funny in itself, especially with the "Mr." formality routine. :lol:

Oh, BTW- I find it disingenuous but not "odd" at all that some people find the joke funny only by switching the names to the other party. OTOH- I found the joke originally funny by it's theme, not by knocking the other party. Contrary to what BOGUS thinks I really do think more middle of the road and not a right wing Christian that he dispises so much. I suppose the point is to some people, being conservative or liberal or Democrat or Republican occupies most of their time. Me? I don't really care. Really I don't! I'm too busy having fun. And that I believe pisses off the Bogy.


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## Laverne (Feb 17, 2005)

DonLandis said:


> ...I'm too busy having fun...


!rolling

That's the funniest thing you've said in MONTHS! (Well, excluding the other day..)

And I find it quite ironic that you accuse Bogy and Geronimo of having no sense of humor. The pot is much blacker than the kettle. :nono2:

But I also find it ironic that you all are using the Laughter forum to argue about who is funny and who is not.


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

Laverne said:


> !rolling
> 
> That's the funniest thing you've said in MONTHS! (Well, excluding the other day..)
> 
> ...


Thanks mom.


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## DonLandis (Dec 17, 2003)

Laverne said:


> !rolling
> 
> That's the funniest thing you've said in MONTHS! (Well, excluding the other day..)
> 
> :


I don't do humor, I'm an engineer. When engineers try to do humor people get nervous. But just to prove it to you, look out for some humor soon in this section from the perspective of a broadcast engineer. I've found that this lightbulb change joke was only funny to other broadcast engineers.

_"
And I find it quite ironic that you accuse Bogy and Geronimo of having no sense of humor. The pot is much blacker than the kettle. :nono2:

"_

Need a lesson in reading comprehension, Laverne?  I said I take Geronimo as having a sober persona. Never said that about Bogy, I just accused him of posting mostly "bogus nonsense.' In fact, I laugh at much of what Bogy posts here and in Potpourri. I take him serious 95% of the time in the Computer section, however. His true calling is probably being a good tech support person at a call in center. :eek2:

Now you see, He just referred to you as MOM. That was funny too!    :lol:

_"
But I also find it ironic that you all are using the Laughter forum to argue about who is funny and who is not. [/QUOTE]"_

Stating one's opinion of what you find funny here and what you don't shouldn't be ironic at all nor is it an argument as it is just opinion, nothing more.


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## ntexasdude (Jan 23, 2005)

DonLandis said:


> I don't do humor, I'm an engineer. When engineers try to do humor people get nervous. But just to prove it to you, look out for some humor soon in this section from the perspective of a broadcast engineer. I've found that this lightbulb change joke was only funny to other broadcast engineers.....................


Yeah, well, Don, I are an inguneer tooo. I gwaduated from a fine ABET accredited southern learnin institution with a fine gpa (cept chimistrie, which I hated) and got a job makin' nuff to buy a new 4 wheel drive and a double wide.

Engineers *are* funny, my wife and kids laugh at me everyday.:lol:

Gawd, don't get me started. I've traveled these great states too many times to remember. I've met brilliant enginners who humbled me and others who couldn't recite the quadratic equation.:nono2:


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## Richard King (Mar 25, 2002)

> Now you see, He just referred to you as MOM. That was funny too!


When you are referring to Bogy as a "he" I am sure you don't have to capitalize the word "He". If you continue to do so "he" will get a bigger head than "he" already has. Unless, of course, the "He" in your sentence was not referring to Bogy, but "his" boss.


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## DonLandis (Dec 17, 2003)

Richard- No, considering the time I probably typed that out on my PDA/ XV6700 and I'm not too accurate with that tiny keyboard. 

ntexasdude- Now you're sounding like a friend of mine who lives in Houston. An electrical engineer with BP. You and he must have graduated from the same school.


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

DonLandis said:


> I don't do humor, I'm an engineer. When engineers try to do humor people get nervous.


I'm glad you realize your limitations Don. Leave the humor to professionals. :lol:
I average 1 or 2 good laughs and several chuckles each Sunday morning. Part of what makes my current church such a good match for me is that I like to inject a little humor into the sermon, and they like to laugh. You get mad at me because I don't take everything as seriously as you do. I'm here to have fun. I don't figure I am going to change any one's mind anyway, and we aren't goint to solve the world's problems. That leaves us with having fun. At least it does me. As a pastor I know that most of the problems I face are NOT going to be soved immediately. I deal with people, and they normally only change slowly, if at all. If a pastor takes the problems he/she faces to "seriously" they burn out. (I fully expect this to be taken out of context, if you don't get it, you don't). An engineer faces problems of a physical nature, and assumes there is an answer, and that the answer can be achieved on a timeline. We approach things with different assumptions. You may have an advantage when we are discussing physical/mechanical problems, but when we are dealing with people, you are at a disadvantage. As you are with humor. Including your assumption that only engineers could find your joke about the lightbulbes funny. And because we make different assumptions about how problems can be resolved, we also come to different solutions or resolutions. As an engineer, you assume there can only be one "real" answer, and I must be wrong (at the very least) since I don't come up with your (the correct) answer. That is why I pay attention to what you have to say about engineering/audio/video issues, and laugh (and shake my head) at what you have to say about social issues.

OK, that is way to much for the humor forum.


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## Laverne (Feb 17, 2005)

Bogy said:


> ...As a pastor I know that most of the problems I face are NOT going to be soved immediately. I deal with people, and they normally only change slowly, if at all. If a pastor takes the problems he/she faces to "seriously" they burn out. (I fully expect this to be taken out of context, if you don't get it, you don't)...


I understand, Bogy, more than you know.

You're not God, you just work for Him.


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## DonLandis (Dec 17, 2003)

_"You get mad at me because I don't take everything as seriously as you do. I'm here to have fun. I don't figure I am going to change any one's mind anyway, and we aren't goint to solve the world's problems. That leaves us with having fun. At least it does me."_ 
Were you quoting me here?? But I've never seen you mad either. Mostly I'm laughing at many of your posts, but in the computer section I take your posts quite respectfully and seriously as you often make excellent points. I ahve said what you stated many times about fun and you mostly ridicule those attitude points. I just took it as defined in your sig, I'm happy so you feel it is your duty to afflict me.

_"As an engineer, you assume there can only be one "real" answer, and I must be wrong (at the very least) since I don't come up with your (the correct) answer. That is why I pay attention to what you have to say about engineering/audio/video issues, and laugh (and shake my head) at what you have to say about social issues."_

That is partly wrong- Engineers are trained to find several ways to resolve a problem and are trained to rate those ways with pros and cons. Then the manager is challenged to decide which will be best for the purpose. Sometimes the engineer IS the manager and this requires, IMO, he first wear the hat of engineer, leaving his managment hat on the rack. When he is done objectively listing all the options, he then has to switch hats and select what's best. It is at this point that decsion may also involve how it affects his people and his customer base. I have had considerable experience as a technician, engineer, and manager. I'm not saying all engineers use the hat on the rack approach but I always did as it helped me keep objectivity when developing a process and its alternatives but when that part was done, I could switch gears and think about just the outcome of each method. My education in management began after about 8 yerars as a pure technician and engineer. I do believe that the best managers are those that have a background first in the technologies. But then that is just how I did it.

When it comes to humor- I can certainly laugh and enjoy the creative works of others, I don't claim to be the life of the party with a cache of humorous stories but have found the stories of others including most pastors humorous as they were usually anecdotal and I could easily relate. It is a different style of humor than the likes of racial and political difference jokes that are so popular. I'm sure you are an expert in that style of clean sermon support humor, but like most ministers, you probably need to build that humor as part of a serious sermon that is long for it to really work. The same technique is quite effective in general public speaking.

Finally the part where we will probably never agree and we both shake our heads at each other's outlook is on politics. You were the one who came to this thread and suggested the joke would be more humorous if the names were changed to as I took it 'Republicans.' This is, IMO, showing your intolerance of anything that is not in line with your own political viewpoint. This why I shook my head at your first entry. IMO, it was out of place, not funny and contributed nothing to the huimor but did spread your Democrat support evangelism to this section.

And yes, this response to your points is serious. I apologize to others for having to defend my position here as I know this kind of thing really belongs elsewhere.

Maybe it is best we don't bother others debating these viewpoints we differ on and just agree to disagree as it is said, and I promise to return to making every attempt at not responding to your politics when it is out of place, as I recognize it is here. I'll defer to letting others do that now if they wish. No, I won't ban your posts from my view as I believe I can restrain myself from being conned into a no win argument with you on politics. I do recognize that when it comes to the forbidden subjects of sex, religion and politics, you can only win over people who aren't worth winning over anyway. If you remain strong in your beliefs then lets just say you and I will help maintain the balance!


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

'nuff said as far as I am concerned.


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## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

'Nuff said is right! 

Some of you people sure know how to ruin a funny joke and kill the laffs. :nono2:


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

Come up with a funny joke and we'll see what we can do.


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## ntexasdude (Jan 23, 2005)

Did you hear about the two cannibals that were eating a clown?
One looked the other and said "Does this taste funny to you?"


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## Bogy (Mar 23, 2002)

I had to ask for a "funny" joke.  :lol:


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