# How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?



## Throckmorton

*How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?*

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed 
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently 
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs 
1 to move it to the Lighting section 
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section 
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs 
5 to flame the spell checkers 
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames 
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid 
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp" 
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct 
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum 
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum 
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty 
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs 
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's 
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group 
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too" 
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy 
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?" 
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs" 
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.


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## reweiss

14 to say Dish's light bulbs look better
+137 to say Dish's light bulbs are not as clear because they use compressed bulbs
4 to argue that no one else knows as much about bulbs as they do


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## Throckmorton

6 to tell you not to tamper with the leased light bulb and advise you to plug in an auxiliary light bulb next to it.


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## The Merg

Throckmorton said:


> 6 to tell you not to tamper with the leased light bulb and advise you to plug in an auxiliary light bulb next to it.


As soon as I saw your OP, I was hoping someone else hadn't posted that one! That was the first one to come to mind for me. :lol:

But, on that note...

3 to complain that we've beaten a dead horse on the to tamper/not to tamper issue.

- Merg


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## Nick

1 to acknowledge that the subject post is very funny but since it has little to do with DirecTV, it actually _deserves_ to be in the "*Laughter*" forum for all to enjoy.


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## Drew2k

1 to complain this thread is in the wrong forum
5 to complain that incandescent light bulbs are evil and fluorescent bulbs should be used
6 to counter that to fluorescent bulbs are eviler and LED should be used
10 to argue that they will burn incandescent bulbs for as long as they want, Al Gore be damned
8 to argue that global warming is a myth
3 to tell the three to get :backtotop


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## BubblePuppy

1 to post +1 to all the above


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## Herdfan

1 to ask WTF?


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## BattleScott

Don't forget at least 3 to contend that, since they have never had any problems with their bulbs, that surely the OP must have had some sort of "defective" bulb, did not have it correctly installed, or even question the original bulb's "alleged" failure...


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## timmmaaayyy2003

5 to find the thread in another forum and repost before searching and creating a duplicate thread


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## Go Beavs

3 to say "In before the lock"


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## johnp37

Nick said:


> 1 to acknowledge that the subject post is very funny but since it has little to do with DirecTV, it actually _deserves_ to be in the "*Laughter*" forum for all to enjoy.


Agreed. Move it or close it.


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## Stuart Sweet

One Super Moderator to move this to the Laughter forum.

What, you didn't see that coming?


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## johnp37

Thank you Stuart.


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## Nick

3 ultra-conservative users to strongly object to the use of words _'screw'_,_ 'insert'_, _'tight'_ or _'tingle'_ in conjunction with replacing light bulbs and who also refuse to keep candles on hand for emergency lighting due to their phallic symbology and potential for inappropriate use.


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## Stuart Sweet

A different question: How many Harvard Law students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He holds the light bulb and the entire universe revolves around him.


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## hdtvfan0001

Stuart Sweet said:


> One Super Moderator to move this to the Laughter forum.
> 
> What, you didn't see that coming?


Not really....no grumpiness was involved.


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## barryb

When ever I see these I always go to:

"How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb....?"

"you wanna ride bikes?"

(I grew up with ADD, so I get it)


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## Nick

1 member to inquire what capacity UPS backup should be used to keep the light bulb burning in the event of a power outage.


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## paulh

1 to ask when a shared blinking feature ever be available
1 to post "soon"
3 to point user to CE forum.


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## paulh

1 to ask if he can also use that new lightbulb in his "vacation" house


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## netconcepts

So far..
20 posts to one-up and add to the type of members who reply. 

oops. make that 21.


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## flexoffset

5 will respond without using words; only a string of marginally relevant emoticons.
:uglyhamme :goodjob: :feelbette

10 will have the word "edited" below their posts to cover up their inaccurate comments about light bulbs after being flamed.


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## Ric

15 to ask when the new light bulb will get updated for multi room viewing capabilities


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## coldsteel

1 person to complain about all the new-fangled technology like light bulbs in the first place...


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## Phil T

1 to wish Nick a happy belated birthday! (oops wrong thread)


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## BubblePuppy

1 person that doesn't get threads about light bulbs and wants it closed


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## rudeney

1 to post an analogy that argues how replacing the light bulb is like buying a new car and it's better to fix the broken one

And then 5 more to post how car analogies don't apply.


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## davring

One to ask if there is any way to get a brighter bulb without extending his/her commitment.


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## Throckmorton

At least a few who want to spend 99 cents on a standard brightness bulb and expect to use it like a $1.99 high-brightness bulb.


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## BattleScott

Throckmorton said:


> At least a few who want to spend 99 cents on a standard brightness bulb and expect to use it like a $1.99 high-brightness bulb.


then there will probably be at least 1 who will start a poll on how many people would use a bulb with this feature...

many who will join the bulb makers "prototype evaluation team" to test it...

and when it becomes available to the public, at least 1 who will ask if there is a way to "force" the stores in their area to carry it before their scheduled delivery date...


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## hdtvfan0001

I'll gladly volunteer to write the lightbulb First Look!


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## Tom Robertson

And someone will put this into their signature:



> *Replacing a defective light bulb
> DOES NOT start a new commitment.*


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## Nick

At least 17 will ask how to change a light bulb whose fixture is mounted high on the roof of their two-story house, and soon, how to brush snow off said light bulb to eliminate snow fade. :shrug:


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## yosoyellobo

During my FlashForward I was changing a light bulb.


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## BattleScott

Tom Robertson said:


> And someone will put this into their signature:


That would be weird, what kind of commitment would you need for a light bulb? 

But even if you did have to aggree to one, it's highly unlikely that any reputable bulb maker would erroneously extend a commitment for replacing a defective one...

:grin:


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## rsblaski

Three to complain that the CSRs know nothing about light bulbs and claim that D* does not support their use.


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## hdtvfan0001

The answer - ZERO.

Forum members use low voltage LEDs to illuminate their homes.

Light Bulbs are so "last millenium"....


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## barryb




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## BubblePuppy

hdtvfan0001 said:


> The answer - ZERO.
> 
> Forum members use low voltage LEDs to illuminate their homes.
> 
> Light Bulbs are so "last millenium"....


I use captured fireflies.


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## sigma1914

Don't forget that 1 member who doesn't use the same bulbs & bulb service as everyone else in that sub-forum, but they still think they know all about your bulb service, have snide remarks about your bulbs & service, & never know what they're talking about.


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## Jim Parker

One to say that the term "thread" should not be used, as some bulbs have pins, not threads, therefore the correct term is "electrical contacts".


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## rudeney

There will be three posters to tell you your new light bulb needs to be on a UPS, or at the very least a surge suppressor.


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## hdtvfan0001

BubblePuppy said:


> I use captured fireflies.


That's so last Stone Age....


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## BubblePuppy

hdtvfan0001 said:


> That's so last Stone Age....


 But it is very "Green" or "Yellow".


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## hdtvfan0001

BubblePuppy said:


> But it is very "Green" or "Yellow".


You have a point....

<note the tin foil cap>


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## BubblePuppy

hdtvfan0001 said:


> You have a point....
> 
> <note the tin foil cap>


:lol:


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## CJTE

barryb said:


> When ever I see these I always go to:
> 
> "How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb....?"
> 
> "you wanna ride bikes?"
> 
> (I grew up with ADD, so I get it)


+1000


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## CJTE

BubblePuppy said:


> But it is very "Green" or "Yellow".


Speaking of green, where is the ugly bastard whom which we all love?


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## CJTE

3 to derail the light bulb thread with a bunch of off topic posts before being told to get back on topic!

(I volunteer to be the first)


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## Tom Robertson

barryb said:


> When ever I see these I always go to:
> 
> "How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb....?"
> 
> "you wanna ride bikes?"
> 
> (I grew up with ADD, so I get it)


Squirrels!


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## BobaBird

Two to point out they've been using light bulbs since the days of incandescents and to ask why the new one has to be "professionally" installed.


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## Go Beavs

One to start an anticipation thread on the next version of the light bulb that includes the ability to project light into another room.


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## dettxw

I'll test the new beta bulbs.


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## Throckmorton

6 to ask how to power their light bulbs with a single wire instead of that pesky twin-lead.


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## bigshew

2 to rant about how the tv commercial for light bulbs is full of lies.

1 who says the guy who does bulb impressions is very annoying.


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## Richard King

dettxw said:


> I'll test the new beta bulbs.


I read on another highly reputable site that the beta testing of the new bulbs has ended.


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## hdtvfan0001

1 poster to create the thread
1 to dispute the OP
1 to stand up for the OP
1 to dispute the person standing up for the OP
1 to interject that the OP bought the wrong kind of lightbulb
1 to respond that the previous poster had no business talking about lightbulbs since they didn't own any
1 to respond that they didn't need to own a lightbulb to see the light
1 to interject on how a lightbulb is actually constructed and receives transponder data from D10
1 Mod to interject back on topic
1 to respond that these were the best light bulbs ever made since the dawn of time
1 to ask a question pertaining to anything other than lightbulbs
3 to respond to that question
1 Mod to again interject that if folks were not on topic, the thread would be closed
1 legitimate post

<crickets heard loudly>

Thread then closed.

So I guess the answer is 16.


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## BubblePuppy

hdtvfan0001 said:


> 1 poster to create the thread
> 1 to dispute the OP
> 1 to stand up for the OP
> 1 to dispute the person standing up for the OP
> 1 to interject that the OP bought the wrong kind of lightbulb
> 1 to respond that the previous poster had no business talking about lightbulbs since they didn't own any
> 1 to respond that they didn't need to own a lightbulb to see the light
> 1 to interject on how a lightbulb is actually constructed and receives transponder data from D10
> 1 Mod to interject back on topic
> 1 to respond that these were the best light bulbs ever made since the dawn of time
> 1 to ask a question pertaining to anything other than lightbulbs
> 3 to respond to that question
> 1 Mod to again interject that if folks were not on topic, the thread would be closed
> 1 legitimate post
> 
> <crickets heard loudly>
> 
> *Thread then closed.*
> 
> So I guess the answer is 16.


By1 Mod with or without a post of explanation, confusing all other posters as to what they must have done.


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## matt

1 to ask if the bulb is covered by the protection plan

37 to argue that light is a feature and not a service


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## sigma1914

matt1124 said:


> 1 to ask if the bulb is covered by the protection plan
> 
> 37 to argue that light is a feature and not a service


1 to resurrect an old thread from 3 months ago.


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## hdtvfan0001

sigma1914 said:


> 1 to resurrect an old thread from 3 months ago.


...and 1 to post a !rolling


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## davring

And another who read this entire thread to only realize it is irrelevant as he has no electricity in his house.


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## billsharpe

davring said:


> And another who read this entire thread to only realize it is irrelevant as he has no electricity in his house.


I don't know about irrelevant but my elephant has electricity in his house:icon_lol:


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## matt

billsharpe said:


> I don't know about irrelevant but my elephant has electricity in his house:icon_lol:


Are you referencing Edison's elephant or something else I don't get?


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## billsharpe

matt1124 said:


> Are you referencing Edison's elephant or something else I don't get?


irrelevant = your elephant vs. my elephant

but I give up if I have to explain the supposed play on words. :nono2:


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## MikeS

1 lurker to indicate that 6 months has not elapsed yet.


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## Nick

> How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?


Plus 1 infrequent poster to make his annual post to keep his membership alive.


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## Ned C

What I want to know is "How many pancakes does it take to fill a dog house"?

and the answer is??????

13 cause there's no bones in ice cream.!!!


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## Phil T

???

http://64bitarmy.com/lol//bunny-pancake.gif


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## matt

billsharpe said:


> irrelevant = your elephant vs. my elephant
> 
> but I give up if I have to explain the supposed play on words. :nono2:


Oh I thought there was some correlation between Thomas Edison's light bulb, electricity, and the elephant he electrocuted.


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## timmmaaayyy2003

3 to start the poll about how much the light bulb "service" is worth to them.


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## jilardi2

could someone please move this to the OT or something, as this is not about lightbulbs anymore. theres talk about pancakes, what does a pancake have to do with a lightbulb.


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## curt8403

I was at the zoo the other day, I saw a relevant in a pitched battle with 2 hypotenuses. There was a circle of Allegories watching.


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## audiomaster

You need light to see to eat the pancakes!
And by the way, does anyone know what the current software version is on light bulbs, when an update is coming and what fixes/additional features it will have? And whether it will screw up any working function, like the production of light?


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## Tom Robertson

audiomaster said:


> You need light to see to eat the pancakes!
> And by the way, does anyone know what the current software version is on light bulbs, when an update is coming and what fixes/additional features it will have? And whether it will screw up any working function, like the production of light?


We're seeing the end of life on inc models. And I've lost track of their version number.

We're on V3.0 of CFL--though their days are likely numbered too.

As for LED, we're on version .9. Many suitable uses have already been found tho the home version isn't really GA yet. Very close.



Cheers,
Tom


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## Nick

I am the proud owner of two very expensive 3-way CFLs. 

Bright, brighter & brightest doesn't exactly describe them.


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## davring

My neighbor is a dim bulb; his wife told me the protection plan won't replace him.


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## drpjr

1 to ask if he can open the bulb and put in a bigger filament and if it burns out will he still be able to use the old one.:lol: or will it still work if he moves it to a new fixture.


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## scroll

now, its getting boring.


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## matt

scroll said:


> now, its getting boring.


and one to agree


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## Carl Spock

How many boring posters does it take to change a light bulb?

I'll tell you in a second but first let me review the results of this thread. Back in post #1...


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## jerry downing

What's a light bulb? LEDs and CFLs here.


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## T-pole

LOL


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