# Eve, the first carpenter



## dmspen (Dec 1, 2006)

Did you know Eve was the first carpenter?


































She made Adam's Banana Stand.


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## bjdotson (Feb 20, 2007)

dmspen said:


> Did you know Eve was the first carpenter?
> 
> And I thought you were going to say she created the first woody.
> 
> She made Adam's Banana Stand.


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## James Long (Apr 17, 2003)

I have not heard that one since junior high ... and have not wanted to.


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## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

There once was a man from Kent...


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## B Newt (Aug 12, 2007)

Who is Cap'n Crunch's superior officer?











General Mills !rolling


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## billsharpe (Jan 25, 2007)

C'mon guys. This thread is titled "Laughter is the Best Medicine."

You can do better than this... :blackeye:


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## 4HiMarks (Jan 21, 2004)

Three nuns were out for a drive, and got into an accident where all three were killed. When they got to the Pearly Gates, St. Peter told them:

"Sisters, you have devoted your entire lives to God and have been good Christians, so you will get into Heaven, but first you have to take a little quiz to check you devotion. It's only one question, and if you are truly devout, you should have no trouble."

The nuns thought this was a little strange, but it appeared to be God's will, so they agreed. After all, what else could they do?

First up was the Mother Superior. She was 86 years and had taken her vows when she was just a teenager. She spent her entire life studying the Bible and knew the entire thing by heart, Chapter and Verse. So she was pretty confident.

"Ask away, St. Peter. I'm sure I can answer."

"OK, says the gatekeeper. Who was the first man on Earth?"

"That's easy." the Mother superior replied. "It was Adam."

DA-TA-DA-DA! Trumpets blare, the Pearly Gates swing open, and she is ushered into Heaven.

The next nun isn't as old as the Reverend Mother, but she's been at the convent for over 30 years, and knows the Bible pretty well. Besides, the Mother Superior's question was real easy, so she is pretty confident.

"Who was the first woman on Earth?" St. Peter queries.

"That's easy, too." she responded. "It was Eve."

DA-TA-DA-DA! Trumpets blare, the Pearly Gates swing open, and she, too, is ushered into Heaven.

Finally come the young Novitiate. Just 18 years old, she had just taken her vows last month. She was a good Christian girl from a good Catholic family growing up, went to church every week, and knew her Bible pretty well, but didn't have the whole thing memorized, like the Reverend Mother. She was nervous at the beginning, but the first two nuns had gotten really easy questions, so she was feeling a little more confident.

St. Peter posed the following:

"What were the first words, of the first woman on Earth, to the first Man on Earth?"

"Ooh! That's a hard one!" she replied.


DA-TA-DA-DA! ...


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## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

*Joke Jeopardy* - here are the punchlines, you tell the jokes.

$200 "He's the first lawyer we've ever had."
$400 "She was a good wife."
$600 "Ok, send 'em on out."
$800 "C;mon, Fannie, let's get the hell outta here."
$1000 "Think we should tell him where the stepping stones are?"


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## trh (Nov 3, 2007)

Nick said:


> *Joke Jeopardy* - here are the punchlines, you tell the jokes.
> 
> $200 "He's the first lawyer we've ever had."
> $400 "She was a good wife."
> ...


I'll take Jokes for $1,000.

What is: 


> A Catholic priest, a Baptist preacher and a rabbi fish in a lake. The preacher has to use the bathroom, so he walks across the water, does his business and walks back. Then the rabbi has to go, so he walks across the water, does his business and walks back.
> 
> The Catholic has to go, but when he gets out he falls into the water. He swims back, gets back into the boat, and says, "God, let me walk across the water." He tries again and falls into the water, swims back, tries again and falls again.
> 
> The Baptist leans over to the rabbi and asks, *"Do you think we should tell him where the stepping stones are?"*


I'll PM you my mailing address.


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## billsharpe (Jan 25, 2007)

I'll take jokes for $400.

As a funeral train passes by a golf course, a golfer on one of the greens stops stands at attention with hat held over his heart as the hearse goes by. Then he goes back to lining up his putt. His playing partner remarks how that was the nicest gesture he'd ever seen, to show such respect for the dead. The first golfer sinks his putt and says, 'Well, she was a good wife."


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