# Why it's great to be a guy!



## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

Men Are Just Happier People--

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be President.

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years .... maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.


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## Upstream (Jul 4, 2006)

Showed this to my wife, and she replied, "At least my balls don't itch."


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## Nick (Apr 23, 2002)

:thats: Now _that's_ funny! !rolling :lol:

...and my _vagina_ has never itched.


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## Snoofie (May 29, 2003)

Upstream said:


> Showed this to my wife, and she replied, "At least my balls don't itch."


Oh geez that is funny! I'm sitting here on a slow work day, reading old posts and I busted out laughing reading this. I would have laughed for a week if my wife had come off with a line like that.


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## smiddy (Apr 5, 2006)

Upstream said:


> Showed this to my wife, and she replied, "At least my balls don't itch."


I like your wife's sense of humor, very good stuff there. :lol: !rolling



Nick said:


> :thats: Now _that's_ funny! !rolling :lol:
> 
> ...and my _vagina_ has never itched.


I keep a tube of vagisil in my bat bag for softball for when guys start whining, I go to hand it to them and ask, "Is your vagina itching?" :lol:



Snoofie said:


> Oh geez that is funny! I'm sitting here on a slow work day, reading old posts and I busted out laughing reading this. I would have laughed for a week if my wife had come off with a line like that.


Agreed, Mrs. Smiddy ever said anything like that I'd loose my lunch.


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## Sirshagg (Dec 30, 2006)

Upstream said:


> Showed this to my wife, and she replied, "At least my balls don't itch."


What she doesn't realize is that thats just and excuse. :grin:


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## Draconis (Mar 16, 2007)

You forgot the fact that we can write our names in the snow.

Sadly, I do not think that qualifies as a new art form.


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## Stuart Sweet (Jun 19, 2006)

Thanks for posting this, I saw it about 12 years ago and have been wanting to reread it!


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## TheGreatLogan (May 25, 2008)

woooooooooooooooo joojoojojojo, nice man, this goes to my fotolog! yeah!


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